Healthy Morning Muffins

Ingredients:
1 1/4 cups flour
1/2 cup packed dark-brown sugar
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1/2 tsp coarse salt
1 cup old-fashioned rolled oats
1/2 cup raisins
3 Tbs extra-virgin olive oil
1 large egg
1/2 cup milk
4 medium carrots, shredded
1 medium ripe banana, mashed


Cooking Instructions:
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Coat a 12-cup muffin pan with cooking spray. In a large bowl whisk together flour, brown sugar, baking soda, baking powder, nutmeg and salt until there are no more lumps. Stir in oats and raisins. Add oil, egg, milk, carrots and banana and stir until blended.

Fill each muffin cup with 1/4 cup batter. Bake until a toothpick inserted in center of a muffin comes out clean, 23-25 minutes.


Serving Suggestions:
Serve warm or at room temperature. To store, keep in an airtight container, up to 3 days.


Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "Betsy"

Or should I say "Well Balanced Moms Are More Fun?" Let me ask you, When was the last time you had lunch with some girl friends, or went on a girl's night out? When was the last time you went on a romantic weekend getaway with your spouse? If you can't remember, we definitely have to talk.

It's so easy to fall into the mommy guilt trap. We feel guilty if we take time for ourselves, so we end up taking care of everyone in the family but us. It's easy to lose ourselves in the quest to become Super Mom. Along the way we get stressed out and aggravated. It's important to do something just for us to stay balanced moms. Here are some ways for you to get started on your journey to rediscover YOU.

1. Get together with some girlfriends. One of the best ways to rediscover yourself is to spend some time with your girlfriends each week. Have lunch together, go to the movies to watch the latest chick flick, or plan a girl's night out every once in a while.

2. If you are having a bad day, call one of your girlfriends to vent, or just chat. You'll be surprised how much better you feel and how it puts things back in perspective that seemed like the end of the world a few minutes ago.


3. Spend a romantic weekend with your spouse anywhere but at home. Go away for a romantic weekend with your spouse a few times a year. Rekindle your passion for each other and feel in love again, instead just partners in dealing with the everyday stuff involved in raising kids.


4. Go on a date every week. Get a sitter once a week and go on a date with your significant other. Spend some time reconnecting with each other. If you have an activity that you both enjoy, take a class together.


5. Pamper Yourself. Do something every week to pamper yourself. Go get a new haircut. Visit your favorite nail saloon for a manicure, pedicure or to get your nails done. Call your favorite day spa and schedule a facial. Get a massage.

If you are on a budget, pamper yourself at home. Send Dad and the kids to the park. Take a hot bubble bath and paint you toenails. Honey makes a quick facial. Place a cloth in warm water and apply to your face to open the pores. Smear on honey, and leave on for 15 to 30 minutes. Rinse off with warm water.

Don't feel guilty about taking time for yourself a few times a week. Your kids will appreciate it when they get a balanced and fun mom in return. You will be more relaxed, happier and actually be able to enjoy your family. After all, that's why you had kids in the first place, didn't you?

Originally posted on SaltLakeCityMommies

My husband, Adam, left this morning for a conference in Houston, TX.  He's gone to conferences before, but this is the first one since Rowan was born.  I always have had a lot of respect for single parents, when he's gone that respect just grows and grows.  Each conference he's gone to has presented me with new and different challenges as a parent.  The first conference Kara was just a year old and she got her first big illness.  I was unable to get much sleep or food.  All she wanted was to lay on my lap and be held.  Going to the bathroom was an adventure: have you ever tried to hitch your pants up when your child is strapped to you and throwing up at the same time?  Other conferences I've had the joys of explaining to Kara why her dad isn't there and why he wasn't going to be home for x days.   I got quite skilled at keeping her distracted from his absence.  This time though I am presented with 2 new challenges.  The first being that I now have two children, one that is awake frequently during the night and needs much of my attention (and body).  The second is one I had not thought of before.

How do you express emotions around your children?  Prior to Kara when Adam would go to a conference I would have cried a bit, gone home, eaten junk food and watched TV, read some books, done a puzzle and stayed up way past my bedtime.  Now I know better than to spend my time watching TV, staying up late and eating junk food.  I'm sure I'll read plenty of books and may do some puzzles. Granted the books may not be more complicated than naming dinosaurs and the puzzles will have less than 50 pieces.  But what to do about the desire to cry?  Do I show Kara how sad I am that her dad has left?  Do I let her see how worried I am about how our time alone will go and his safety?  Or do I keep a stiff upper lip and keep on going as if nothing has changed?  If I don't express my emotions, in a healthy way that is, am I teaching Kara to not acknowledge her own emotions?  Does that teach her to be a stoic and afraid of emotions?  If I show her the tears does that then lead her to fear and worry when she shouldn't have that burden?  Will she feel she needs to take care of me since I am sad?  This also leads me to examine how we deal with Kara's tantrums and other outbursts of emotion.  Right now we ask her to calm down and say that once she is calm we can talk about what is bothering her. But does that teach her that she shouldn't express the emotion?  Would it be better to say "wow, you are really sad/angry/upset.  Let's take a moment to be that way, then we can calm down and talk about what has made you feel that way"?  We do try to acknowledge the emotion by saying "you sound really sad", but is that enough?  Do we need to give her more space to feel and express the emotion?  I want to raise children that are not afraid of their emotions and can express them in a healthy way.  I don't want them learning to stuff their feelings down or to think that it's not ok to let others know how they are feeling.  Emotions can be powerful and influence our thinking more than we often realize or admit.  To have a healthy relationship with emotions would allow them to recognize, feel, and then move on past the emotions so they do not influence their decisions excessively.  The question is- how to achieve that.

Submitted by Heidi-rose Creuzinger, member of NorthMetroDCMommies.  Heidi-rose blogs at Terror at 3 Feet & Rising.

Creamy Ranch Pork Chops

Ingredients:
1 tbsp oil
4 boneless porkchops 3/4" thick
1 can cream of mushroom soup
1/2 soup can milk
1 pkg (1 oz) ranch salad dressing mix
paprika

Cooking Instructions:

Heat oil in skillet. Add chops and cook until browned. Add soup, milk, 1/2 dressing mix. Heat to a boil then cover and simmer for half an hour over low heat.
Before serving sprinkle with paprika

Serving Suggestions:
Serve with a veggie blend and applesauce.

Additional Comments:
You can make a ranch-style rice to go with it by putting the rest of the dressing mix in the rice water.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "Carole"

What if you had a place to go that had the same great support as your local chapter, but with more specialized forums and thousands of members across the United States?

What if that place offered encouragement to mommies in specific situations, such as stay-at-home, work-at-home, and military mommies?

What if that place provided interaction in groups discussing the latest Twilight books, couponing tips, and other hot topics in today's culture?

What if you could get all that for free?

Well, wonder no longer, because it's here at The Mommies Network National Forum. With 3,000 members and growing, the National Forum offers the same great support you've come to know from your local chapter, but with a twist. It features unique forums not available on your home site, including couponing, family vacation tips (including Disney), and alternative medicine.

Looking for someone to chat with about Twilight and other vamp books? Check out our "Everything Vamps" subforum in Books, Movies, & Entertainment. Are you a stay-at-home, campus, or military mommy looking for a friend? Talk with those in your situation in one of the Our Work subforums. Do you have a child with special needs and desire interaction with other mothers who are dealing with a specific condition? We have subforums related to specific diagnoses in Our Kids With Special Needs.

Members of this free site may purchase a Premium Membership, which contains extra forums, such as Debate This and Classifieds, along with other perks.

Mommies across the country are chatting it up in these and many other groups in the National Forum. So skip the "what ifs," and join us for enhanced support on a national scale!

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My mom visited this past week (a whole blog on its own I assure you) and of course, when the ‘rents visit, we try and do something extra throughout the week for fun. One of the activities we did this week was to go bowling. Now bowling sounds like a safe, friendly thing to do with kids. I thought so. I mean, I used to take Zavi once in a while when we lived back in Mass and we never had an issue. So what could possibly go wrong bowling with 2 more kids added in and a grandmother? Oh. My. God.

To anyone who may be reading this and was at the bowling alley the same time we were, I am so sorry. I hope Ashe did not erase your computerized game thingy. I tried to keep him away, I really did. But that bugger is fast!

We got the Citi guide coupon book a few weeks ago and I saw you could get one game free of bowling. So on Zavi's early release day from school we piled into the car and drove to the local bowling alley. The older boys were excited, Soren was passed out in a drunken stupor, and my mom and I had high hopes. Bowling! Yay! Fun! Good times!!! We park the ginormous minivan (I'm getting better at parking that monster!) unload the kids in less than 5 minutes (a new record!) and head on in. And that’s where all hell broke loose.

You see, Ashe hates loud noises. He went to the fireworks this past July 4th and freaked out. I mean FREAKED! The whole time he sobbed yelling "FIREWORKS ALL DONE ALL DONE DADDY FIREWORKS ALL DONE" for the entirety of it. Stupid me, I didn’t even think that the sounds of bowling would mirror that of fireworks. Crap. And it’s dark in there with the black lights going, the music bass thumping and vibrating the floor. Ashe took 2 steps in and froze like a deer caught in headlights. And then started shaking. And I couldn’t take him home. J was working on a huge project and I had promised Zavi we would do this. He had been looking forward to this for weeks with Grammy. So I gave the car seat with Soren in it to Grammy, picked up Ashe, and cuddled/dragged him to get our shoes and lane. I had this thought that maybe I could get him used to it in time and he would be ok. I kept whispering "its ok honey it’s not fireworks (Yeah can I get shoes in size 8 kids, 13 kids...) Mommy’s here I won’t let you go (adult size in 8 and 10? Lane 4? Great...) I promise you are safe and ok, it’s not fireworks, no we can’t go back to the van sweetie (Here's my card.... can you hold the top so I can sign?... thanks) sweetie stop kicking Mommy that hurts...no I won’t put you down..."

After finally hauling 4 pairs of shoes and a squirming screeching two year old to our lane, waaaaay on the other end of the alley, I tossed shoes at Grammy and Zavi and took Ashe toward the back. Holding him I calmly told him how much fun bowling is, how he gets to choose a few really cool balls, and try to knock down things without getting yelled at. It took about 10 minutes of constant soothing whispers with a few thrown out yells to Zavi (Hang ON! I'll get the computer set up in a minute... ask Grammy...oh Grammy you don’t know how to do it? Dammit... ok hang ON!) until I could get Ashe to accept sitting on my lap closer to the bowling lanes. While Zavi went searching for the perfect ball, and Grammy took forever putting her shoes on, I tried figuring out the technological savvy computer to set up our game with a squirming two year old clinging to me like we were going down with the Titanic.

So after working the computer one handed, and everyone is ready to go we start bowling. Zavi goes first. And he does pretty darn well (with the bumpers on). Next up is Grammy. She also bowls well (with the bumpers on). Then it's Ashes turn. I ask him if he wants to roll the ball and he says YES so I stand up. To which point he grabs my shirt and clings so hard I’m afraid my cleavage and then some is apparent for all to see. Hauling him up and my shirt back into place, I waddle over to the bowling ball stand and ask him which color he wants. He points to a blue one, of course, 36 pounds. I pick it up with Ashe still stuck stronger than superglue to me, and slowly make my way to our lane. I put the ball down, wrestle to get his chubby STRONG fingers off my shirt, and gently show him how to roll the ball. He screams, throws himself on the floor and begins to cry. I sit down next to him; ask him if he wants to play. After a minute he agrees, wipes the tears from his eyes, and allows me to help him. We get a good roll going and he stares fascinated as the bowl rolls towards the pins, taking eons to make it there. But they go down and his face lights up and......

He’s hooked.

By our 6th round, Ashe has taken over my game, Grammys game, and his own. We found a child roller which helps little kids roll the balls down better. He would whip it into place, point at me to put his ball down, then shove it hard (rolling over my fingers a few times...OUCH!) and jump up and down screaming for joy. When it was Zavi’s turn, he would run to any computer in sight and start jabbing buttons (Sorry!!!!) If he wasn’t doing that he was running to put his head by the bowling stand where the used balls were racing back. I swear he came close to having three concussions in 15 minutes, despite my frequent attempts at keeping him far away from the darn thing. And Soren, my precious baby, was an angel. He slept for almost the entire thing. If he was fussy I just think I would have lost my mind.

Walking out afterwards, everyone was in high spirits. Except for me. I was happy the boys had a ball in the end (no pun intended) but all I could contemplate at that moment was how much tequila I had left in the freezer and how big of a margarita I wanted. I figured I earned it and then some.

Submitted by Brittany (Rhaven) of TriangleMommies.  Originally posted August 23, 2009 on Suburban Rebel Mom.

Balsamic Roasted Artichokes

Ingredients:
2 whole fresh artichokes
1 can reduced sodium chicken broth
5 cups of water
1 Tbsp. Olive Oil
1 Tbsp. Balsamic Vinegar
1/4 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper
1 Tbsp lemon juice

Cooking Instructions:
1. Wash artichokes in cold water.
2. Snip off sharp points and trim the stem.
3. Cut artichokes in half length-wise.
4. Carefully cut or snip out the spiny inner leaves and remove the "choke" completely.
5. Place in a bowl of water with lemon juice to avoid browning.
6. In a large pot, combine chicken broth with water and bring to a boil.
7. Boil covered artichokes for 20 minutes.
8. In a small bowl, mix olive oil, balsamic vinegar, salt and pepper.
9. Remove artichokes from pot and baste them on both sides with the oil and vinegar mixture.
10. Place artichokes cut side down on a grill set to medium.
11. Turn after 5-7 minutes and baste again.
12. Pour remaining mixture into the cups of the artichokes.
13. Cook an additional 5-8 minutes, careful not to char the artichokes.
14. Serve hot with or without dip.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "Eileen"

A common complaint of many mothers is the daily struggle of what to wear. Most mothers express exasperation that they dress too casually, and some say, sloppily. Many mothers do not have the time in their busy schedules to devote to finding appropriate and attractive clothing.
Help can be found with a wardrobe consultant who will review your closet, assist you in determining your clothing needs, provide shopping assistance, and organize your closet.


If you find that you stand in front of your closet full of clothes and have nothing to wear, I recommend that you find someone to watch the children for a half day and devote it to reviewing
the clothing in your closet. Put on some music of your choice and pop open a Diet Coke or have a glass of wine if you're feeling more adventuresome. You'll need to try on everything, unless by sight you find that an item is too worn, stained, or a size that you haven't seen for awhile.

Once you try on the remaining clothing ask yourself the following questions:
1. Does it fit?
2. Does the color suit me?
3. When was the last time I wore this?
4. Does this fit into my current life situation? (i.e. a stay-at-home mom doesn't need a closet full
of power suits);and,
5. Do I like it? (can I run into an old boyfriend and feel attractive?).

Items that don't meet the above criteria can be donated to a charity. Please make sure that the item is in good condition; the rule is to only donate what you would consider buying. Items with tags still attached can be sold on eBay or at a consignment shop. The balance of the items can be
tossed or recycled for your "rag bag."

Most women need the following for a casual winter wardrobe:
1. Jeans in a darker wash;
2. A pair of black pants. The current style recalling Audrey Hepburn looks good on most women
and can be dressed up or down. I recommend that you have several pairs so that when one pair is
in the wash, you have another to wear;
3. A pair of corduroy pants in a boot cut style;
4. A few sweaters in a classic style. I happen to like the J Crew Wesley cable style in the v-neck
so you can layer a blouse or t-shirt under. Plus, they are really soft and wear well;
5. A pair of short boots to wear under your jeans and pants;
6. A pair of flat shoes to wear with your black pants. Try black or an animal print for more style;
7. T-shirts in white and other colors that you like. The Old Navy ones are a terrific value;
8. A sweater coat - a Fair Isle type weave will add pop to your pants and jeans. Also, it doesn't
get that cold in Richmond, and, since we spend most of our days in cars, a heavy coat isn't needed for most days; and,
9. A "real" winter coat for colder days.

That's all you need. I find that the more choices women have, the harder it is to decide what to wear. Pare down and you'll find that you are more confident and ready to face the world!
The best part of the above list is that you can order these by catalog or on the internet. This is my favorite way to shop because I can try the clothing on at my own pace and match them to my existing pieces. No need to drag a 2 and 4 year old through the mall!
Now you need to organize your closet. Take out anything that isn't clothing related. Find a new place for Christmas paper, sport equipment, and toys. When you're doing this it's a great time to streamline your home. Make sure that you are using the same style of hanger; it takes up less rod space. I like the plastic "jewel" style hanger that you find in department stores. You should also buy a few shoe boxes and some baskets to put belts and scarves in. You can get these items at Target for a reasonable price.

Originally posted on RichmondMommies

Fish, Veracruz Style

Ingredients:
6 tablespoons oil
1 no. 2 1/2 can tomatoes, chopped
1 teaspoon sugar
3 teaspoons chili powder
1/2 teaspoon allspice
1 clove of garlic, crushed
1/2 teaspoon grated orange rind
Salt and pepper to taste
1 onion, chopped well
6 - 8 red snapper fillets
1 small can pimientos, chopped coarsely
2 tablespoons capers
One 3-oz jar green olives, pitted and chopped coarsely
Parsley, fresh, chopped as a garnish
3 boiled potatoes (optional)


Cooking Instructions:
Heat 3 tablespoons oil in heavy skillet. Combine the tomatoes with the sugar, chili powder, allspice, garlic, orange rind, salt, pepper and onion. Blend well and simmer in oil for about 10 minutes, covered. Coat baking dish with remaining oil. Put the fish in baking dish; add the pimientos, capers and olives to the tomato mixture and pour over the fish. Bake in a moderate (350 degree) oven for about 30-35 minutes or until fish flakes easily when pierced with a fork. Sprinkle with just enough fresh parsley to add a little color.




Additional Comments:
Serve the potatoes on the side or some people prefer to add cubed, hot, boiled potatoes to the fish during the last 5-7 minutes of cooking.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by a member

So, let us get right to it.

I am guessing that there are minimally a few things you would have different about your body and that at least some of your time and energy is invested into mulling this over; well "sweet pea" that, is an exceptional waste of both resources.

It has taken me a very long time to learn to love myself and becoming a mother played a significant role. It all started when I decided that my post-pregnancy body was disgusting, I was so miserable and obsessed about it constantly. It brought misery to every area of my life, I stopped taking care of myself, I didn't shave for 6 months (by the time I did my landlord had to snake our drain because I clogged it). I would not let my partner anywhere near me and when we did have sex I was disgusted by it. I would spend hours looking in the mirror, for the sole purpose of intensifying my hatred.

About 4 months after I returned to my full-time job following my maternity leave, I quit. I needed to be at home with my son. He had 2 very invasive, painful surgeries during that time and I just had to be home with him. I took a part-time waitressing job and that was that, I was a stay at home mom. One day shortly after I was home full-time with him and following one of the above mentioned surgeries, we were hanging out taking pictures. Now he had to have arm restraints on so that he could not do any harm to the site of his incision, he was around ten months old.

So, here I am sitting on the couch watching my little man crawl and climb with these "no, no's" holding his arms perfectly straight, laughing and smiling and doing all of the things that they said he couldn't; and it occurred to me that I was a jerk. This child grew in me, this body nurtured his, and every part of him was a part of every part of me. He had already endured so very much; he had a face sewn together when he was just 4 months old and had just had the inside of his mouth sewn together and his nose broken, and here I was whining and sobbing about stretch marks and extra weight. I understood in those moments that my body was what it was because it was supposed to be, I had gained and grown, stretched and changed to accommodate him. So there it was, my very first real moment of truly loving my body, the body that had gifted me my son.

As women we are bombarded day in and day out with images and information that defines beauty for us, it comes to us from every direction at various different volumes. So what is all of information telling us? For the most part we are presented with an unattainable standard, a grand lie that whispers to the majority of us that we are simply not enough. For some of us, we are just not thin enough, others too thin, our cheekbones and bums not high enough, our breasts not perky enough, and blah, blah, blah.

You are indeed Beautiful regardless of these silly and unrealistic messages, how do I know this? Understand that all Women are Beautiful, each and every one of us. What is the benefit of ignoring or disregarding our Beauty, what is the pay off for treating ourselves poorly and hating any aspect of our bodies?

Beauty is found in simply being a Woman, Beauty is found in the diversity of Women. Beauty is confident and strong, self-aware and actualized. Beauty is about identifying one's personal style and "rockin" the "what" out of it. Beauty is not giving a "what" about what anyone else says or thinks Beauty is, it is ignoring the images and voices that tell us that we are not Beautiful. Beauty is seeing the Women on television and in magazines and recognizing their Beauty without using it to define what we are Not. Beauty is whatever we believe is Beautiful about ourselves.

It really is that simple, I think my larger behind is fly, some girls may think their tiny behinds are fly, just stop looking at other chics and finding the "imagined" ugly in you. Look at other Women and admire their own unique Beauty while embracing and cherishing your own.

In the world of me I have decided that being a Woman makes me absolutely spectacular. I adore my own abilities to create and hold another, warm in my womb while it grows, its energy glowing bright in my belly. I respect that my body was made to carry this being and cultivate it with spirit and structure alike, sharing my vital organs to assure its health and safety. I find my woman's body, spirit and structure, to be like the earth; giving and breathing life, sustaining and nurturing, protecting and destroying. Knowing that I cannot have anymore children strengthened my appreciation for the plethora of greatness my body offers beyond creating and carrying a child. I also believe firmly that a woman is to be the governor of her decision to bear children. Before becoming un-expectantly pregnant, I would not have chosen to have children.

For those of us, who are not able to have children or choose not to, we must remember that our body is the house of our true and deepest self, we must create, cultivate, nurture, and protect this self with the same ferocity we would our unborn child. This helps me to introduce you to my own adoration of my ability to create and hold my true self, warm in my centers as it grows, its energy glowing brightly in my chakras. What I mean by all of this is we as Women have a responsibility to take care of ourselves and each other.

My woman's body is plush and ripe, my own to bring pleasure and gift it to others, my own to decorate and adorn, my own to cleanse and forgive. My own to protect, my body should be free from the harm of myself and others; never to be taken, raped, or defiled. My choices are my own about my body and I should live free of ridicule and judgment. I believe that a Woman is the master of her own body and she belongs to no one other than herself or whomever she gifts herself to. If someone else is to take of my body without my unmitigated consent, I am entitled to re-claim and seek vengeance for this despicable wrong.

As a woman I understand that power resides within and around me and I accept my responsibility to embrace and use that power. Knowing that being a Woman means I am Brilliant and Beautiful, Kind, Caring, and Compassionate, Empathetic and Gifted, Nurturing and Emotional while also recognizing that I am Fierce and Strong, Competitive and Driven, Wild and Intelligent, Rational, Disciplined, and Physically Competent. I am Everything, Everywhere, in Every Woman, and so are you.

Originally published on CharlotteMommies.com

I met Donna Gilbert at my very first La Leche League meeting in Raleigh, NC in 2007. Since then, she has always been warm and welcoming, and able to answer any questions I have. Despite having two previous failed nursing relationships, Donna and the LLL allowed me to nurse my third child for two years, and my youngest, who was MUCH like my first (refused to nurse) for a year. Thanks to the success she enabled in my own breastfeeding experiences, I decided to interview her in hopes that other nursing mothers can benefit from her knowledge.

When did you decide that you wanted to help other women successfully breastfeed?
I thought about [it] when I realized how little support there is. It was a natural thing for me to want to help. Both my parents are ministers, so I grew up in a home where helping people was akin to breathing. It’s what I do. I guess you could say it’s in my genes.

How long did you breastfeed your own child?
Do you really want me to answer this question? Perhaps it would scare people. lol Well, I think she nursed much like an infant for about 4.5 years. I know it wasn't really like an infant, but at times it felt like it was that intense and that often. Between 4.5 and 5 it decreased to nothing. She basically weaned during that time.

Who was the most positive influence in your life, pertaining to helping other moms?
Helping mothers in particular? I can still remember how wonderful it felt when a La Leche League Leader told me how smart I was. I was about 5 months pregnant and completely unsure of myself. I was a very reluctant mother and it was those few comments she made that gave me a little bit of hope. I’m sure I’m not the only mother out there who felt that way and I would like to do that for other moms.

What are some websites or other resources that you point moms to when they need their questions answered?
I absolutely love Dr. Jack Newman’s website and videos. A picture is worth a thousand words. DrJackNewman.com

How often and how long should baby nurse?
Babies are just like other people when it comes to eating. Some people eat quickly and some people eat slowly. Some people like a few big meals and some like to nibble all day. Your baby may have just gotten the milk flowing and you think it’s time to change sides because you are looking at the clock. So the real answer to this question of how long should my baby nurse is this: Let your baby suck until they are satisfied. If they seem fussy, try compressing your breast to see if you can help the flow a little and once baby is done on that breast, either because they aren’t getting any more milk or aren’t getting it quickly enough, or because they’ve fallen asleep, then you switch sides. Your baby will let you know when they want to eat and when they want to stop eating. In the early days, if baby is awake, offer your breast. They only have so much energy and all of that energy should be geared to survival – in this case, breastfeeding. As they get older, they will spend more and more time discovering the world around them.

A newborn’s tummy is very small, especially in the early days, so it takes very little to fill them – only about 1 teaspoon on days one and two. By day three, baby’s tummy can hold almost an ounce and by day ten, baby’s tummy can hold about 2 ounces. This is why a baby nurses so often, especially at first.

How do I know my baby is getting enough to eat?
First and foremost check is to see that your baby has a good latch and is swallowing. You should see or hear your baby swallowing. Their ears will wiggle slightly while they are nursing and their lips will be turned out. Your breasts should feel softer after you feed your baby.

If your baby is gaining weight steadily after the first week of age, is passing enough clear or pale urine (about 6 wet diapers per day after the first two days), and is having about 3 bowel movements a day, is having short sleeping periods and wakeful, alert periods, your baby is likely getting plenty of milk.

It’s important to note that it is common for babies to lose some weight right after birth (up to 10% of their birth weight), so you needn’t be concerned. Keep nursing them and they should have regained that weight by day ten. Most babies gain from 2/3 to 1 ounce per day during the first 3 months.


What does a breastfeeding mother need to succeed?
Support.

When is the best time for breastfeeding to start?
Within the first hour after birth.

What is the best breastfeeding position?
Whatever position is the most comfortable for you and your baby. I will often get mothers to do a few swallows with their head in a different position to demonstrate how difficult it is to swallow if you are not looking straight ahead. Go ahead. Try swallowing with your head turned one way or the other, or with your head tilted up or down. Difficult, right? Remember that when you are positioning your baby to nurse. Another interesting thing I noticed is if I hang my head face down and open my mouth, my jaw falls forward and my tongue naturally falls down to the floor of my mouth. That is the position you want your baby’s jaw and tongue to be in when they nurse. If I tried to do that sitting up or lying on my side, it’s much harder. Many moms find nursing in the early days is much easier if baby is lying face down. Find a place where you can recline far enough back so that gravity will hold your baby on your chest. Put baby between the breasts. The baby will wiggle themselves toward the breast and all mom has to do is help them out a little by sliding their bottom to one side and the baby virtually latches themselves. It’s called laid-back nursing and you can check it out here: biologicalnurturing.com

What can Dad do?
Offer support. That’s the most important thing he can do. You need someone beside you at 3 am who will remind you that this is a learning curve, not to give up too soon, and most importantly, give you a hearty and reassuring “you can do it”!

Dad can also spend special skin-to-skin time with baby while mom takes a bath or a shower, burp and change baby, and basically anything and everything else!

What can I do before my baby is born?
Get good prenatal care. This can help you avoid early delivery which makes breastfeeding harder. Get as much breastfeeding information as you can. Take a class or two and attend a support group for nursing moms. Take a class from a lactation consultant. Then you can establish a relationship before the baby comes and you may not be so hesitant to ask for help when you need it. Talk to your doctor and/or lactation consultant about any breast surgery or chest injury you may have had. Make sure your doctor knows you intend to breastfeed your newborn and would like to do that within the first hour of life.

Can I breastfeed even if I am sick?
I suppose we should define ‘sick’, but generally, yes. If you are sick, your breast milk will have antibodies that will help protect your baby from getting the same sickness. There are very few exceptions. For example, radiation therapies require a temporary break from breastfeeding.

Can I take medicines if I am breastfeeding?
Yes, with a few exceptions, cancer chemotherapy agents being one of them. Check with a lactation consultant, La Leche League Leader or with “Medications and Mothers’ Milk”, a book by Thomas Hale found in bookstores and libraries. You can also go online to http://toxnet.nlm.nih.gov/cgi-bin/sis/htmlgen?LACT

Some medications have a drying effect on breast milk, such as some over the counter cold medications and allergy medications, so you will want to use those sparingly if possible.

Do I have to restrict my sex life while breastfeeding?
No. If vaginal dryness is an issue, try more foreplay and water-based lubricants. You can feed your baby or express some milk beforehand so your breasts will be more comfortable. If your breasts leak, put pressure on the nipple and have a towel handy to catch the milk.

Do I still need birth control if I am breastfeeding?
Breastfeeding can delay the return of normal ovulation and menstrual cycles. This is called lactation amenorrhea method, or LAM. Like other forms of birth control, it is not 100% effective. LAM is 98% effective in preventing pregnancy during the first 6 months only if the infant is exclusively breastfed, the interval between feedings is less than 6 hours and the mother has not resumed menstruation. The use of pacifiers and infant formula are associated with an earlier return to menstruation.

Barrier methods, like condoms, do not contain synthetic hormones and therefore do not interfere with milk production.

Estrogen can decrease milk production. Progestin can decrease milk production if introduced before a mother’s milk supply is established. Most manufacturers recommend waiting at least 6 weeks. A trial period of taking the oral medication is preferable to having more potent procedures like injections so you can stop taking them if you notice a decrease in your milk supply.

Do you have anything else to say to new or expecting moms, or moms that want to try to nurse again, after not having such a great experience with previous children?
Yes! Give it a try! Every pregnancy, every baby and every breastfeeding experience is different. Gather as much information as possible and do your best to find a support group. Believe it or not, support is the number one predictor of success. If you can get past the learning curve of 6 to 8 weeks and establish your milk supply it is well worth it for the ease that follows.


Donna has a Diploma in Dental Hygiene (1986) from Dalhousie University in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada, and she is an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (2009). She has had personal experience breastfeeding and she has coached births. She has been a La Leche League Leader since 2004 and is a retired leader with Attachment Parenting International.

Originally posted by Becka from SaratogaCountyMommies on The Mommies Network National Blog, 3/25/11

Double-Bean Burritos

Ingredients:
1 (3 1/2-ounce) bag boil-in-bag brown rice
1 cup chunky bottled salsa
1 (15-ounce) can black beans, rinsed and drained
6 (10-inch) flour tortillas
6 tablespoons bean dip (such as Frito Lay)
3/4 cup (3 ounces) shredded Monterey Jack cheese with jalapeno peppers
1 peeled avocado, cut into 6 slices
12 cilantro sprigs
6 lime wedges (optional)

Cooking Instructions:
Cook rice according to package directions, omitting salt and fat.
While rice cooks, combine salsa and black beans in a small saucepan; cook over medium heat 5 minutes or until thoroughly heated. Stack tortillas; wrap stack in damp paper towels. Microwave at high 25 seconds or until warm.

Spread 1 tablespoon bean dip over each tortilla; top each tortilla with 1/4 cup rice, 1/3 cup black bean mixture, 2 tablespoons cheese, 1 avocado slice, and 2 cilantro sprigs; roll up.

Serving Suggestions:
Serve with your favorite salsa for dipping.
Serve with lime wedges, if desired.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "Becky"

Let's face it, where there are kids clutter is sure to follow. Kids are natural born hoarders whose rooms are notorious for being a cluttered mess.  At times you may have even wondered if a tornado just ripped through there or if perhaps the place was possibly burglarized while you were loading the dryer. One never knows. As much as you'd like to, you will never completely eliminate the clutter. But, there are a few things that you can do to get it under control and make life much easier for everyone.  Avoid the impulse to tackle this project all on your own, instead use this as an opportunity to teach your child responsibility and the basics of organization. The time you invest now will pay huge dividends in the long run.

Step One: Clear The Clutter!
The very first step towards bringing calm and order to the chaos is getting rid of the clutter. Start by sorting through everything in the room and remove as much as possible that doesn't NEED to be there starting with the floor. Well...you do NEED the floor, but you get what I mean.
I find that using three large bags or boxes marked donate, trash, and keepers works well for making quick work of this step. Just grab the item and toss it right into it's new home. Yeah, we can see a floor again!

Step Two: Stow The Stuff
Now that you've cleared the clutter, step two involves organizing and storing what's left using kid friendly storage items such as bins, bookshelves, clear containers, cubbies, hooks, etc. Every item will need a place to call "home." The key here is finding an easy system that's right for your child and will motivate them to be and stay organized.
If you find that even after the big purge your child still has too many toys and books or you just want to limit the amount of stuff in your child's room in general, rotate them. Just pop a few of them into a box and stash them away. After about a month or so, pull them down and trade them out. Rinse and repeat. They'll get a real hoot out of re-discovering their "new" old toys.

Step Three: Maintain Order (No, really)
Ok, so now that the hard part of clearing the clutter and stowing the stuff is out of the way, it's time to set some simple ground rules to help make staying tidy and organized a part of each day. In addition to the usual "put it away when you're done," I find that having a "Morning Pick-up
Routine" and an "Evening Pick-up Routine" really helps us a lot.
This will help them to stay ahead of any messes that would have otherwise accumulated during the week making it one large project to tackle over the weekend. That's no fun! Speaking of "staying ahead of messes," here's a tip inside of a tip. Set up a "Donation Station" in a place where everyone has access. Whatever works best for your family, a hall closet, laundry room, garage, etc. Whenever family members come across something that they no longer want or use, it goes into the "Donation Box." When the box is full, drop it off at your local donation center.
Your family will benefit in 3 ways:
1.) You enjoy a less cluttered home
2.) You help other families
3.) You get a tax deduction (be sure to ask for a receipt)
Everyone's a winner!
Don't worry if your child's bedroom doesn't exactly look like a page torn from the latest Pottery Barn Kids catalog. (A girl can always dream right?)  That's not the goal. What's important is that they learn to be responsible for their own things. A valuable lesson that will serve them well for years to come.

Originally posted on FrederickMommies.com

So, I need to talk to you about something very important. And yes, it has everything to do with books. I need to know how you're reading these days. Are you reading hard copies of your books - as you always have and always will? Hardbacks. Paperbacks. Mass Market copies that fit in the smallest bags you own?

Or have you gone to the technological side and got yourself a Nook or a Kindle? Any sort of eReader at all?

I can't decide. I love my books. But believe me, I'd have a lot more space in various rooms of my home if I had less of them. And I'd never have to leave my house to buy the latest title that sparks my interest. AND I could carry more than one book at a time with me when I travel (not that that's frequent or anything - but still) and switch it around if I wanted to without worrying.

And no more tearing ads out of magazines to create bookmarks. That would be nice. You know the kind? The little tear outs that are in every magazine? Oh, and magazines! I could subscribe to more and not worry about how quickly I read them and whether or not I'll be able to recycle all those pages well enough to feel a little bit greener.

But I would totally miss the page by page feel. I would totally miss how a book feels in my hands. The weight of it. The smell of it, even. I would miss living in the bookstore like I normally do. More than once a month we head there to take our daughter to play with the trains at Barnes and Noble.

But see, there's another concern. Kindle or Nook? I live off Barnes and Noble, ALWAYS. But I am saving the Amazon giftcards that I have been getting through Swagbucks so I can buy one [a Kindle] for practically nothing. Sort of.

So what do I do? What did you do?

Fill me in on why you switched to an eReader, or why you think you never will. And I'll just keep reading. And reading. And - well - you get the idea!

Happy Reading -- however you do it!

Originally posted on the TriangleMommies blog on 5/7/11
Andrea is a SAHM who blogs about her everyday life, motherhood and more over at http://goodgirlgoneredneck.blogspot.com

Photo by: SingChan

Pani PoPo ~ Samoan Coconut Bread

Ingredients:
* 1 (12 ounce) package frozen dinner rolls, thawed
* 1 (10 ounce) can coconut milk
* 3 tablespoons sweetened condensed milk(optional)
* 3/4 cup white sugar, or to taste


Cooking Instructions:
1. Coat a 9x13 inch baking dish with cooking spray. Coat your hands with cooking spray or shortening, and roll the dough balls in your hands so that they have a light coating. Place in the prepared dish. Set aside in a warm place to rise until doubled, up to 2 hours.
2. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). In a small bowl, stir together the coconut milk, sweetened condensed milk and sugar. Pour this mixture over the top of the rolls as evenly as you can.
3. Bake for 15-30 minutes in the preheated oven, until golden brown. Let cool for a few minutes before separating and serving.


Serving Suggestions:
This is great for desert or as an appetizer.


Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "Katie"

Ingredients

• 1/2 oz. (approx. 3 tsp.) grated or roughly chopped beeswax (local organic Co-operative)
• 1 oz. (approx. 6 tsp.) coconut oil (local organic Co-operative)
• 1 1/2 tsp. lanolin (Left over from Breast feeding my babes)
• 3/4 tsp. vitamin E (I had capsules in my cabinet and poked holes in them to add up)
• 2 tsp. hard honey (local organic Co-operative)
• 3/4 tsp. peppermint essential oil (local organic Co-operative)

As the beginning of school fast approaches, we are faced with another year of lunch box choices. Children form their eating habits ealry and it is wise to get them into the habit of packing and eating a healthy lunch.

Most heart disease, obesity, osteoporosis and other life long diseases begin to develop in childhood. Usually, it is a handful of foods that do the most damage and so a handful of changes can go a long way towards a healthy diet.

Let your children help pack their lunch box and offer them healthy choices. Tell them the benefits of their choices. Children truly do like to be educated and it is amazing at how much healthy information they will retain and perhaps even share with others. By offering them choices, they will feel as if they have had a say in their lunch and you will be confident that they will make a wise healthy choice. By adjusting your child's lunch box menu, you can add energy to their day, years to their life, and a healthy attitude about eating in the future.

Remember the following tips and do not forget " A handful of changes goes a long way".
1. Milk should be 1% or fat free. Whole milk is the largest source of saturated fat in a child's diet. Milk keeps hearts healthy and arteries clear.
2. When using cheese, opt for low fat or fat free. Cheese is the 2nd largest source of artery clogging fat.
3. Switch from regular lunch meat to low fat or fat free. Often they taste quite the same!
4. Always offer a fruit choice. Apples, oranges, grapes, bananas, fruit cups or applesauce. Try serving them in a variety of ways to keep it exciting. Also offer yogurt or peanut butter as a dipping sauce.
5. Always offer a vegetable choice. Vegetables reduce your child's chance of heart disease, cancer, stroke and blindness later in life. Offer small carrot sticks, celery, cucumbers. broccoli or small salads. Offer ranch dressing for vegetable dip.
6. Use whole grain bread instead of white bread. The label must indicate that it is "whole wheat".
7. Limit sugary snacks such as sweets, cakes, candy and doughnuts. Most teachers will appreciate this as well.
8. Replace regular potato chips with baked chips, pretzels, nuts, breadsticks or low fat crackers. Also beware of Olean (olestra) products, these can cause cramping and diarrhea. They can also rob your child's body of important cancer fighting carotenoids and phytochemicals. One ounce of Bugles contains as much fat as a McDonalds Quarter Pounder.
9. Use 100% fruit juice, water or flavored water for drinks. Most other juices have only 10% fruit juice and as much sugar as soda.
10. If you use Lunchables, buy the low fat Lunchables. Regular Lunchables get 2/3 of their calories from fat and sugar.

Have a safe and healthy back to school!!!

Originally posted on CharlotteMommies.com

The Mommies Network would like to thank everyone who participated in the National Auction! Twenty-five percent of the proceeds from the auction will go to support Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. The remaining 75 percent of funds raised will be used to further The Mommies Network mission to provide a safe, secure, FREE place for mothers to find support and encouragement from other mothers and to empower them to be better women, parents, and community leaders.

Ladies, you all know what I am talking about when I utter these two nasty little words: “mommy guilt.” We all may have been prepared with the perfect nurseries, perfect birth plans, perfect diapers, and even perfect ideas of what we thought motherhood would be like. But we could never have prepared ourselves for the tremendous feelings of guilt that come along with the most important job on Earth. It begins almost as soon as we see the infamous two pink lines on the pregnancy test. We start to analyze each bite of food that we put into our mouths, making the right doctor appointments, getting the right baby gear. However, those guilty feelings of slipping a little extra chocolate as we pat our increasingly round bellies does not compare to the guilt after the babies arrive.

It doesn’t set in right away. In the early days, we are focused on the basics of newborn care and recovering from the birth. It starts to lurk as some start to plan for returning to work and leaving that most precious child with someone who doesn’t love them as much as we do. The thought is enough to rip your heart out. We didn’t expect it to be so difficult. Gulp. The guilt doesn’t go away after the baby stage either. In fact, it grows and gets worse. Why didn’t any of the countless parenting books and articles we read prepare us for it?! Then we have toddlers, which sometimes can be very trying to even the patience of Mother Theresa. We yell, and then wonder if we have warped them for life. We actually purposefully put them in front of the TV so that we can get through paying the bills and the house will stay moderately clean. Then we leave them there because we were so productive that we think we can just squeeze in a few more chores before breaking their zoned-out eye lock on the boob tube. Gasp. Just the thing we never, never, never thought we would ever do. We even used to judge those who did. And then we do it again the next week when we have to tackle the laundry. Horror of horrors.

Mommies, we must give ourselves a break. After all, maybe a gluttonous amount of TV now, will help them self regulate their own TV viewing later in life. Maybe that extra pregnancy chocolate helped us get enough calories to help grow those perfect, tiny fingernails. Perhaps there will be a recall on the more expensive car-seat with the better safety review and we will feel victorious for choosing the less pricey model. Did we love those sweet little people, though? Did we hug them and squeeze them? Yes! Today and every day. Isn’t that the most important thing anyway: that they feel loved? After all, helping our children feel loved deeply is the most perfect thing we can do. Even if we do it imperfectly from time to time along the way. Let us tenderly kiss them goodnight tonight and collectively, we will breathe a sigh of relief.

Originally published on ChesapeakeMommies.com

It is a summer time favorite -a venerable taste of the season. I have loved the taste of these big delicious red and green melons since I was a kid! The experience is unmistakable-with the juices that run down your neck and the seeds you can spit easily because they are slippery-the flavor unmatched. Or so I thought.

The first candies I tasted with watermelon flavor were way back in the mid 1980’s, Jolly Rancher Hard Candies. I was amazed at the flavor, the color and the smell -oh the smell! However great this new candy tasted, I was ultimately disappointed in the lack of subtlety of the candies’ flavor that can only be found in the fruit itself. It was then that I knew right there in the middle of winter, there would just never be the perfect watermelon flavor to whet my appetite. I tried, though. I tried many times to find it. It never was found.

Today, I sit eating a scrumptious piece of the real fruit and I think back to that moment. And, I wonder why. Why couldn’t there be the perfect blend of odor and taste to bring this fantastic delight to me in the wintertime? Well, besides having the watermelons flown in from the southern hemisphere.

I got to work. I looked up natural versus artificial flavors. I looked at histories and chemistry notes. I think I might have the answer.

It all starts with a chemical compound called an “ester”. A chemist can find these esters by boiling down or deconstructing the very fruit, or other natural element, into the chemical components that make it up. Then, when taking the water molecule out of such so that it breaks down even more into a compound made up of the reaction between an acid and an alcohol, one finds the ester.

These esters are the basic building blocks of taste and scent for the flavor. The ester for an orange flavor is called octyl acetate (CH3COOC8H17). The “octyl” is the alcohol and the “acetate” is the acid. So, by adding these esters to a product’s ingredients, the product will taste like an orange. Well, at least to some degree.

I did some further digging and found out that my precious watermelon flavor used to be based on a strong belief that alcohols were the main contributors towards the aroma. The study by some chemists at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign actually found out that a watermelon’s ester, the one that can smell like fresh cut watermelon, is identifiable but not stable enough to flavor anything. It breaks down too quickly. These chemists worked on the problem but found that if you used the ester, nicknamed “watermelon aldehyde”, and bonded it to a synthesized “backbone”, the result still wasn’t good enough to be a suitable replacement for the esters on the market now.

This process goes for every flavor you can imagine. The chemists find the esters. The food producers add the ester compounds to the products. The public figures out if the product does taste like the food producers want you think it tastes. And, we all happily go about our business.

Of course there is a huge debate whether these artificial flavors are a good thing or a bad thing. This follows along the same lines as the debate on artificial colors or news of the development of the Local Food Movement. These ideas will have to be addressed in other blog posts. In this article, I just wanted to find out “why?”

As a result of all my research, here we sit, with a mock watermelon flavor that just cannot satisfy my cravings for this summer fruit during the summer. The real thing is still the best! But, it might just do in a pinch come Halloween!


Written by Adea for the TriangleMommies Blog, part of TMN. All rights reserved. July 2011.

Sweet 'n Sour Coleslaw

Ingredients:
3 lbs of cabbage (purple + Green or either or)
1 cup of minced onion
1 cup of minced red + green pepper
2 cups of sugar
1 cup of vegetable oil
1 cup of vinegar
1 tablespoon of salt
2 tablespoons of celery seed


Cooking Instructions:
Mix together shredded cabbage, minced onion, peppers and 2 cups of sugar.
Let sit for 15 minutes.

Bring to boil in pot, veggie oil, vinegar, salt, celery seed. After it starts to boil, take off stove and pour over cabbage mixture.


Additional Comments:
Best to make this a day or two in advance, so juices have time to penetrate.

Submitted to The Mommies Network recipe database by "lisahrlady"

Pregnancy is a time of physical and emotional transformation. Besides the obvious physical changes, the myriad emotions a pregnant woman experiences can often leave her feeling confused, overwhelmed, stressed or anxious. With so much attention focused on the arrival of the baby, moms-to-be often overlook the importance of nurturing their physical and emotional needs. Massage therapy is a safe, effective way to nurture mom and baby through a very special time.


Massage can be effective in relieving many of the common physical complaints experienced during pregnancy. Morning sickness, joint and muscle pain, headaches, constipation, heartburn, leg cramps and fluid retention are some of the classic complaints that can be alleviated through massage.

It is estimated that nearly 80% of all pregnant women experience morning sickness. It is extremely common during the first trimester of pregnancy and can range from a very mild moment of queasiness to recurrent vomiting. Acupressure can be safely and effectively used to alleviate the feeling of nausea. This technique can be learned and then used anytime nausea occurs.

Other common complaints during pregnancy are joint pain and muscle soreness. This is largely due to the added and redistributed weight. With the added weight concentrated in the abdominal area, a woman’s center of gravity shifts, and it results in postural changes that impact the hip and low back area. It is also common for pregnant moms to experience joint pain in other areas, especially in the knees and feet. Massage helps to alleviate these aches and pains by gently stretching and releasing tight muscles. It also enhances circulation and the delivery of oxygen and blood to the affected areas.

Constipation, gas and heartburn are also inconveniences that pregnant moms often contend with. The relaxation effect of massage stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system, which translates into increased digestion and intestinal movement.

Massage can also help alleviate leg cramps, headaches and excess swelling. The movement of blood, lymph and metabolic wastes is stimulated by massage and is put back into circulation where it can be eliminated by the body.

Stress plays a significant role in how a pregnancy progresses as well as the birth itself. If a mother perceives a situation as being stressful, her body reacts by releasing stress hormones, which cross the placenta. A 1999 study done at the University of Kentucky College of Medicine in Lexington indicated that the fetal heart rates of stressed mothers remained higher longer, suggesting a heightened reaction to stress. Continued exposure to stressful situations during pregnancy has been shown to negatively impact birth weight and may lead to pre-eclampsia and pre-term labor. Studies also show that when pregnant women receive massage, the urinary output of stress hormone levels decrease. Massage has an overall calming effect on mother and baby.

Overall emotional health of pregnant mothers is extremely important. Some mothers may experience anxiety during pregnancy. Maternal anxiety and depression during this time has been shown to have negative postnatal impacts. These feelings in new mothers are often associated with feeding problems, and mothers perceive their babies as being fussy and more demanding. According to a study done by the Touch Research Institute, women who received massage while pregnant reported reduced anxiety, improved mood and better sleep patterns.

Traditional oriental therapies such as Shiatsu and Acupressure can also be very effective in use throughout pregnancy, childbirth and during the postpartum period as well. These therapies are based on Traditional Chinese Medicine theory and influence the energy meridians (pathways) in the body. It is believed that when the body's energy (chi) is blocked or imbalanced in some way, pain and disease results. A massage practitioner who employs Shiatsu or Acupressure techniques helps to restore energetic balance in the body, thereby alleviating physical as well as emotional discomforts. The practitioner should have advanced training in these modalities for use during pregnancy.

Massage therapy can be an integral component of pregnancy and childbirth. Research has shown us that pregnant moms who receive massage have fewer physical complaints, suffer from less pain during labor, give birth to calmer babies, and experience less postpartum depression. Massage can be a safe and effective method of treatment for the many emotional and physical issues surrounding pregnancy. It will undoubtedly contribute to mom experiencing a happier and healthier pregnancy. It is also a priceless gift for the baby to come!


References:

Elaine Stillerman, L.M.T., Touch for Happier, Healthier Pregnancies, Massage Magazine, September/October 2000.

Field, T., Ph.D.; et al., Pregnant Women Benefit From Massage Therapy, Journal of Psychosomatic Obstetrics and Gynecology, Vol. 20, March 1999

{Originally posted on CharlotteMommies}


 

So, let us get right to it.

I am guessing that there are minimally a few things you would have different about your body and that at least some of your time and energy is invested into mulling this over; well "sweet pea" that, is an exceptional waste of both resources.

It has taken me a very long time to learn to love myself and becoming a mother played a significant role. It all started when I decided that my post-pregnancy body was disgusting, I was so miserable and obsessed about it constantly. It brought misery to every area of my life, I stopped taking care of myself, I didn't shave for 6 months (by the time I did my landlord had to snake our drain because I clogged it). I would not let my partner anywhere near me and when we did have sex I was disgusted by it. I would spend hours looking in the mirror, for the sole purpose of intensifying my hatred.

About 4 months after I returned to my full-time job following my maternity leave, I quit. I needed to be at home with my son. He had 2 very invasive, painful surgeries during that time and I just had to be home with him. I took a part-time waitresing job and that was that, I was a stay at home mom. One day shortly after I was home full-time with him and following one of the above mentioned surgeries, we were hanging out taking pictures. Now he had to have arm restraints on so that he could not do any harm to the site of his incision, he was around ten months old.

So, here I am sitting on the couch watching my little man crawl and climb with these "no, no's" holding his arms perfectly straight, laughing and smiling and doing all of the things that they said he couldn't; and it occurred to me that I was a jerk. This child grew in me, this body nurtured his, and every part of him was a part of every part of me. He had already endured so very much; he had a face sewn together when he was just 4 months old and had just had the inside of his mouth sewn together and his nose broken, and here I was whining and sobbing about stretch marks and extra weight. I understood in those moments that my body was what it was because it was supposed to be, I had gained and grown, stretched and changed to accommodate him. So there it was, my very first real moment of truly loving my body, the body that had gifted me my son.

As women we are bombarded day in and day out with images and information that defines beauty for us, it comes to us from every direction at various different volumes. So what is all of information telling us? For the most part we are presented with an unattainable standard, a grand lie that whispers to the majority of us that we are simply not enough. For some of us, we are just not thin enough, others too thin, our cheekbones and bums not high enough, our breasts not perky enough, and blah, blah, blah.

You are indeed Beautiful regardless of these silly and unrealistic messages, how do I know this? Understand that all Women are Beautiful, each and every one of us. What is the benefit of ignoring or disregarding our Beauty, what is the pay off for treating ourselves poorly and hating any aspect of our bodies?

Beauty is found in simply being a Woman, Beauty is found in the diversity of Women. Beauty is confident and strong, self-aware and actualized. Beauty is about identifying one's personal style and "rockin" the "what" out of it. Beauty is not giving a "what" about what anyone else says or thinks Beauty is, it is ignoring the images and voices that tell us that we are not Beautiful. Beauty is seeing the Women on television and in magazines and recognizing their Beauty without using it to define what we are Not. Beauty is whatever we believe is Beautiful about ourselves.

It really is that simple, I think my larger behind is fly, some girls may think their tiny behinds are fly, just stop looking at other chics and finding the "imagined" ugly in you. Look at other Women and admire their own unique Beauty while embracing and cherishing your own.

In the world of me I have decided that being a Woman makes me absolutely spectacular. I adore my own abilities to create and hold another, warm in my womb while it grows, its energy glowing bright in my belly. I respect that my body was made to carry this being and cultivate it with spirit and structure alike, sharing my vital organs to assure its health and safety. I find my woman's body, spirit and structure, to be like the earth; giving and breathing life, sustaining and nurturing, protecting and destroying. Knowing that I cannot have anymore children strengthened my appreciation for the plethora of greatness my body offers beyond creating and carrying a child. I also believe firmly that a woman is to be the governor of her decision to bear children. Before becoming un-expectantly pregnant, I would not have chosen to have children.

For those of us, who are not able to have children or choose not to, we must remember that our body is the house of our true and deepest self, we must create, cultivate, nurture, and protect this self with the same ferocity we would our unborn child. This helps me to introduce you to my own adoration of my ability to create and hold my true self, warm in my centers as it grows, its energy glowing brightly in my chakras. What I mean by all of this is we as Women have a responsibility to take care of ourselves and each other.

My woman's body is plush and ripe, my own to bring pleasure and gift it to others, my own to decorate and adorn, my own to cleanse and forgive. My own to protect, my body should be free from the harm of myself and others; never to be taken, raped, or defiled. My choices are my own about my body and I should live free of ridicule and judgment. I believe that a Woman is the master of her own body and she belongs to no one other than herself or whomever she gifts herself to. If someone else is to take of my body without my unmitigated consent, I am entitled to re-claim and seek vengeance for this despicable wrong.

As a woman I understand that power resides within and around me and I accept my responsibility to embrace and use that power. Knowing that being a Woman means I am Brilliant and Beautiful, Kind, Caring, and Compassionate, Empathetic and Gifted, Nurturing and Emotional while also recognizing that I am Fierce and Strong, Competitive and Driven, Wild and Intelligent, Rational, Disciplined, and Physically Competent. I am Everything, Everywhere, in Every Woman, and so are you.

Originally published on CharlotteMommies.com